Gettin' Hitched Rocks
  • How it works
  • Shop the collection
  • Shop by product
  • Demo
  • Free stuff
  • Contact us
  • About us

Gettin' Hitched Rocks

Advice and inspiration for stress-free wedding planning

  • How it works
  • Shop the collection
  • Shop by product
  • Demo
  • Free stuff
  • Contact us
  • About us
Problem Pal: I’ve finally found the right venue, but there’s no right date
Stress-free wedding planningStress-free wedding planning: Problem Pal

Problem Pal: I’ve finally found the right venue, but there’s no right date

By Mell 9th of November, 2019

Right Place, Wrong Time has written into our Problem Pal advice column with a problem that will sound familiar to anyone who’s looking for their perfect wedding venue.

My fiance and I have been looking for a venue for our wedding all year. It feels like we haven’t had a weekend where we’ve done anything but drive out to stately homes or talk to hotels about packages, but none of them have been right. We can’t imagine having the wedding we want at any of them.

Until…! Last week, we finally found the perfect venue! It’s exactly what we’ve been looking for – and it’s even in our budget! The problem is, when we asked them about dates, they said they didn’t have any more until the end of next year – and they didn’t have any spring dates for the next two years?!

I want to cry. I don’t want to look for another venue but I don’t want to put my wedding off for years either. What should I do?

You need to ask yourself: what’s more important to you, the venue or the timing?

This isn’t a trick question. There’s no right or wrong answer here. It’s down to you and your partner and your priorities.

Work out your priorities as a couple

I’ve spoken to some couples, like Sammi and Simon, who felt the venue was one of the most important parts of their day. When they put down the deposit, they hadn’t entirely worked out their whole budget and what kind of wedding they’d be having, but they decided it was more important to them to be in an incredible venue they both loved, where neither of them were compromising on their ideas for the day, even if they could only afford to host their immediate family there.

The venue wasn’t a backdrop to them, it was a part of the day.

And I’ve also spoken to couples like Lucy and John, who cared far more about having their wedding on a bank holiday, so everyone they loved could make it, than where they got married. They found two incredible venues, but I’m confident there would have been just as many smiles and happy faces in a sports hall or a back garden. For them, the day was about celebration.

And that was right for each of those couples.

Remember: there’s no one single perfect day

On a personal note, I think we can put a lot of stress and emphasis on the idea of a perfect day in the wedding industry. (I’m not immune from it myself!) But that doesn’t mean there is one exact version of your wedding that’s perfect and nothing else is going to be good enough.

Your day will be perfect whatever happens. Your day will be perfect if you get married in a bin liner. Because you’re marrying the person you love. You’re celebrating this incredible person and this incredible relationship you have with everyone you care most about. And cake. It doesn’t get more perfect than that, no matter what you do, what you wear, or where you are.

I got married in a converted railway arch in London. It was all exposed brick, so I chose four bright wedding colours to stand out against the walls and bring some pops of colour into the day, that then lent itself into a broader theme of fun and games, which informed the decor and our decisions.

It was perfect. And it wasn’t anything like I’d imagined my wedding would be. It wasn’t my first choice of venue. It wasn’t my first choice of colour scheme. I didn’t wear my first choice of dress. But it was still perfect.

And it would have been perfect if I’d gotten married in a fancy London club, a country manor, a restaurant, or Disneyland.

I would have loved any of those weddings. (And I looked into them all!) And the day would have still felt right and still felt like me in any of them. People are multi-faceted. There’s not a single type of wedding that’s the only type you’ll ever be happy with. You could love a more rustic, shabby chic style, with all your friends in a converted barn, and a more formal, elegant style in a fancy hotel. Either could make you happy – and you’re not going to regret choosing one over the other.

Take advantage of the time

If the venue you’ve found is the perfect venue for the wedding you want to have – if you can see how it will tie your other ideas together and how the decorations and catering will work, and you can’t imagine anything else exciting you this much, or going anywhere else for photos – get the venue. It’s not unusual to have a longer engagement – especially if you’re already living together.

Take the opportunity to save a little more and to spread out more of your wedding planning. (Though, saving might be the main goal – there are a lot of things you can’t do more than 12 months in advance, like book a registrar or reserve hotel rooms!)

Or use the chance to shake things up

If the idea of waiting two or three (…or more!) years to have your wedding makes you feel miserable – don’t. Yes, this venue is great. But you’ll find other great venues.

Keep looking – and maybe look at venues you hadn’t considered. Country houses can work for an elegant, formal wedding as much as a rustic one. Restaurants and bars can often be rented out in their entirety, and work well for a relaxed day or a formal sit-down reception.

It might also be a good plan to chat to a wedding planner, who will have a lot of ideas, as well as contacts and favours that can be called in, to find another perfect venue. Wedding planners are more affordable than you think they are – and steal your partner far less than Jennifer Lopez may have led you to believe.

They often have packages, where they can do a specific part of your planning rather than the whole thing. And a situation like this, where you’re struggling to find a venue that can accommodate your timeline, is the exact thing an expert can resolve for you.

Talk to your partner

To answer your question, ‘What should I do?’ There’s only one thing you should do: sit down with your partner. Talk. And work out what both your priorities are, and what makes sense for you as a couple.

There’s no wrong answer – as long as you’re both fully onboard.


Do you have any wedding worries you’d like some advice and perspective on? Leave a comment below or email us at hello@gettinhitched.rocks for actionable, anonymous advice on your wedding planning.

Until next time, pals!

Your Problem Pal,
Mell xo

Photo by RawPixel.

Do you have a wedding worry?

Want some outside perspective on your wedding woes? Leave a comment or get in touch for actionable, anonymous wedding planning advice.

Get in touch

Pin this to your Pinterest-perfect wedding board

Advice columnProblem PalRight place wrong timeWedding planning problemsWedding venue
Leave a comment
0
Facebook Twitter Google + Pinterest
Mell
Mell

After planning, designing, and coding her own wedding, Mell started Gettin' Hitched Rocks to help awesome couples stay WHELMED through the wedding planning process, with clever websites that do the work for them.

You may also like

Problem Pal: what to do when your friend...

Problem Pal: how do I pick a best...

Problem Pal: my friend didn’t RSVP to my...

Problem Pal: Everyone else is arguing about how...

Unexpected problems you can run into planning a...

Have your say Cancel reply

About Gettin’ Hitched Rocks

About Gettin’ Hitched Rocks

Hi! I'm Mell.

I started Gettin’ Hitched Rocks to keep you whelmed while you plan your wedding, with wedding websites that do the wedmin for you and send automatic RSVP reminders to the people who need them, and matching stationery, so you can carry the design you love, with your personality shining through in every detail, across every part of your wedding, from save the dates to thank yous — and everything inbetween!

Stay whelmed with our free resources, interviews with real couples on what not to do, our regular Problem Pal advice column, and stress-free wedding planning advice.

Keep in touch

Twitter Instagram Pinterest Bloglovin RSS

House collection designs

Gettin' Hitched Rocks wedding stationery collection - thank you cards

Upcoming events

  • London Most Curious Wedding Fair
    7th - 9th of February, 2020

  • London Chosen Wedding Fair
    Sunday, 29th of March, 2020

Instagram

Instagram post 2184923565401275985_6061390435 Having a wedding website makes your life EASIER.⁠
⁠
* Your mates can see the important details any time, anywhere, on any device.⁠
⁠
⁠
* You can send automatic RSVP reminders, and avoid making those awkward phone calls.⁠
⁠
* You can update your guests when details change with SMS notifications.⁠
⁠
⁠
* You can show everyone EXACTLY what they need to see, so there's no FOMO, and no confusion. ⁠
⁠
* You can automatically collate everything you need to  know, from meal choices, to the number of children, to the number of requests for the Electric Slide. No counting and re-counting (and losing your place and re-counting again). ⁠
⠀⁠
* You can spend more time with the person you're marrying!⁠
⠀⁠
Check out our demo and our full range of gorgeous, stress-free wedding designs at hitched.rocks (link in bio) to see how we can help make your wedding ROCK! ⠀⁠
⠀⁠
.⠀⁠
.⠀⁠
.⠀⁠
⠀⁠
#weddingplanning #weddingplanner #weddingplanningtips #weddingplanningideas #weddingplanningbegins #weddingstress #weddingwebsite #website #websitedesign #weddingoverwhelm #weddingrsvp #rsvp #automateyourwedmin #wedding #weddingsupplier #weddingsuppliers #weddingbusiness #staywhelmed #funwedding #quirkywedding #funweddings #unusualwedding #indiewedding #gettinhitchedrocks
Instagram post 2182749256418173146_6061390435 A lot of couples ask us what they NEED to have at their weddings. What they SHOULD do. What people will EXPECT.⁠
⁠
But there's no right and wrong way to have a wedding. As long as you're married at the end of it, you did it right. ⁠
⁠
While people can add to your stress, insisting you get this or you'll regret not doing that, they only mean to help; at the end of the day, they're coming to your wedding because they love you. They're not going to grade you, your day, or the cummerbunds.⁠
⁠
So have the day you want to have. Pick the bits of weddings you like. Leave the bits you don't. And feel confident that the only two people whose opinions matter are going to have a blast.⁠
⁠
.⁠
.⁠
.⁠
⁠
#weddingadvice #weddingplanningadvice #weddingideas #weddinginspo #weddinginspiration #weddingetiquette #wediquette #weddingplanning #weddingplanningtips #weddingplanningideas #weddingoverload #staywhelmed
Instagram post 2181299723393895794_6061390435 Place settings let you organise your guests - and even your caterers!⁠
⁠
We can print important notes, like 'vegan' or 'pescetarian', or even full menu choices on the back of our individual place setting cards, to make your day run smoothly. All while fitting in with the style and feel of your wedding. ⁠
⁠
And they come with matching signs, table plans, and orders of service.⁠ Swish!⁠ ⁠
Find out more and order a sample on hitched.rocks (link in bio).⁠
⁠
.⁠
.⁠
.⁠
⁠
#placecards #placecard #placecardsetting #placesetting #placesettings #weddingtablesetting #weddingtables #weddingplacecards #weddingplaces #weddingstationery #onethedaystationery #flatlay #weddingsuite #weddingideas #weddingdetails #weddinginspiration #weddinginspo #wedding #quirkywedding #funweddings #funwedding #elegantwedding #weddingsupplier #weddingsuppliers #weddingbusiness #weddingdesign #gettinhitchedrocks
Instagram post 2179850144677069339_6061390435 A wedding website can take the stress out of wedding planning.⁠
⁠
* Send automatic RSVP reminders, so you don't have to make those awkward phone calls.⁠
⁠
* Update your guests easily when details change, and let them know with SMS notifications.⁠
⁠
* Upgrade your mates from evening guests to full day guests when your second cousin's plus one can't make it - without them ever knowing they weren't in your top pick all along.⁠
⁠
* Show everyone exactly what they need to see, so there's no confusion. (And no chance of your grandparents seeing what you did at your bachelor party…)⁠
⁠
* Automatically collate your meal choices, the number of children and babies, song requests, and anything else you need. No counting and re-counting (and losing your place and re-counting again). ⁠
⠀⁠
* Spend more time with the person you're marrying - and less doing the wedmin you'd rather avoid!⁠
⠀⁠
Check out our demo and our full range of gorgeous, stress-free wedding designs at hitched.rocks (link in bio) to see how we can help make your wedding ROCK! ⠀⁠
⠀⁠
.⠀⁠
.⠀⁠
.⠀⁠
⠀⁠
#weddingplanning #weddingplanner #weddingplanningtips #weddingplanningideas #weddingplanningbegins #weddingstress #weddingwebsite #website #websitedesign #weddingoverwhelm #weddingrsvp #rsvp #automateyourwedmin #wedding #weddingsupplier #weddingsuppliers #weddingbusiness #staywhelmed #funwedding #quirkywedding #funweddings #unusualwedding #indiewedding #gettinhitchedrocks
Instagram post 2177675911678351390_6061390435 When you get engaged, everyone from your parents to your dog walker will weigh in on what your wedding should be like, what you need to have and wear and do.⁠
⁠
But it's your wedding. And the only opinions that matter are yours and your partner's.⁠
⁠
Don't feel pressured into following traditions you don't like, having a bigger day than you're comfortable with, wearing something that doesn't feel like you, or spending more than you want to.⁠
⁠
Your wedding is your wedding. It should feel like you. Not Miss Manners, circa 1803.⁠
⁠
It's not rude to say no. It's not rude to ignore advice. It's not rude to not invite thirty second cousins you've never met. And it's not rude to turn down offers to contribute to your wedding, especially if they come with an expectation that you'll do things a certain way.⁠
⁠
Take a deep breath. You've got this.⁠
⁠
.⁠
.⁠
.⁠
⁠
#weddingplanning #weddingplanningtips #weddingplanningideas #weddingoverload #motivation #weddinginspiration #weddinginspo #weddingideas #wedding #weddingadvice #staywhelmed⁠
Instagram post 2176226280247290197_6061390435 Orders of service are a great way to keep your guests in the know and organise your wedding.⁠
⁠
Lay out rough timings of the day. Print your hymn or ceremony reading words, so everyone gets it right. Introduce the wedding party, explain how you met each other, or warn people what time you switch over to a cash bar.⁠
⁠
It's something everyone will see, so put the information they need to see in there!⁠
⁠
See our full range on shop.gettinhitched.rocks. (Link in bio.)⁠
.⁠
.⁠
.⁠
⁠
#weddingstationery #orderofservice #orderofceremony #onthedaystationery #wedding #weddingsupplier #weddingsuppliers #weddingbusiness #weddingdesign #weddingideas #weddinginspo #weddinginspiration #weddingdetails #stationerysuite #stationeryinspiration
Instagram post 2174776805490357037_6061390435 Our wedding websites work on mobile, tablet, laptop... and anything else that has an internet connection! So your guests can get the information they need any time, anywhere, on any device.⁠
⁠
Which means YOU won't have to give your Uncle Jeremy directions off the M25 on your wedding day. Score!⁠
⁠
Check out our demo and find out how a wedding website can keep you WHELMED on hitched.rocks. (Link in bio.)⁠
⁠
⁠
.⁠
.⁠
.⁠
⁠
#weddingplanningtips #weddingplanningideas #weddingplanningbegins #weddingplanning #weddingplanner #rsvp #weddingrsvp #weddingwebsite #website #weddingstress #weddingoverwhelm #automateyourwedmin #staywhelmed #weddingdetails #weddingtips #weddingideas #weddinginspiration #weddinginspo⁠
⁠
Instagram post 2172604858456954680_6061390435 'I'll Be There For You' by Louise Cuddon is the perfect poem to read at your ceremony.⁠
⁠
It's romantic - but not cheesy. It's funny - but not irreverent.⁠
⁠
Check out the full poem - as well as some other suggestions for readings that won't make you cringe - on our blog. (Link in bio or copy and paste: https://blog.gettinhitched.rocks/romantic-wedding-readings-that-arent-cheesy)⁠
⁠
.⁠
.⁠
.⁠
⁠
#weddingquotes #weddingideas #weddinginspiration #weddinginspo #weddingdetails #weddingceremony #weddingceremonyideas #weddingreading #weddingreadings #ceremonyreading #weddingpoem #weddingpoems #poem #poems #romanticquotes⁠ #quirkywedding #indiewedding #funwedding #funweddings⁠
⁠
Instagram post 2171152851547890504_6061390435 Some people will miss your guest book. Some people will avoid your photo booth. But your table plan is the one part of your day you KNOW every guest will see. So have some fun with it!⁠
⁠
Make it fit your personality and your style with table names that reflect your hobbies. Or that tell the story of how you met, with different places that are important to you.⁠
⁠
We have a list of ideas to get you started on our blog (link in bio). And we have a bunch of gorgeous table plan designs, like this one, we can customise to fit your wedding on hitched.rocks.⁠
⁠
.⁠
.⁠
.⁠
⁠
#tableplan #tableplans #tableplanideas #seatingchart #seatingcharts #seatingchartideas #weddingideas #weddinginspo #weddinginspiration #weddingsupplier #weddingsuppliers #weddingsuite #stationerysuite #weddingbusiness #elegantwedding #rusticwedding #gettinhitchedrocks

Popular posts

  • Wednesday Wedspiration: romantic wedding readings that AREN’T cheesy

  • How to word your wedding invitations (and why you shouldn’t stress about it)

  • 7 reasons why you NEED a wedding website

  • The best ideas you should steal from my wedding – and what to avoid

  • Selfie sticks – the new disposable camera

Twitter

We love this table plan in action from a rustic-inspired country manor wedding this spring. Every table is consist… https://t.co/u82glBUgkm
Reply Retweet Favorite
A wedding website just makes your life EASIER.⁠ * Your pals can see the important details any time, anywhere, on a… https://t.co/vmi8b66vpC
Reply Retweet Favorite
A lot of couples ask us what they NEED to have at their weddings. What they SHOULD do. What people will EXPECT. Bu… https://t.co/vw2HKMCRvg
Reply Retweet Favorite
Place settings let you organise your guests - and your caterers! We can print important notes, like 'vegan' or 'pe… https://t.co/hN00ZGgQK7
Reply Retweet Favorite
Did someone say #TongueOutTuesday?! (Because it’s important to take a break from wedding planning once in a while.… https://t.co/ZWY4TkAFLY
Reply Retweet Favorite

Tags

Advice column Free printable Interview Mini-series Problem Pal Real weddings Wedding planning mistakes Wedding planning problems Wedding reading Wednesday Wedspiration

Problem Pal

  • Problem Pal: I’ve finally found the right venue, but there’s no right date

Recent posts

  • The weird history behind 5 wedding traditions (and why you SHOULDN’T follow them)

  • Problem Pal: I’ve finally found the right venue, but there’s no right date

  • You’re WRONG about wedding fairs: 6 reasons why it’s worth going to wedding shows

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Bloglovin
  • RSS
  • Gettin’ Hitched Rocks
  • Contact us
  • About
  • Privacy policy

Copyright © 2019 Gettin' Hitched, Ltd.
International House, 12 Constance Street, E16 2DQ

We use cookies to make this site rock. Find out more